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This post is dedicated to my brothers.
you guys never could take a legit photo... nice to know you haven't changed :)
From the farting in my face, to ruining every barbie I ever owned, to practicing your wrestling moves on me, to night-at-the-roxbury-ing me on multiple occasions in inappropriate places... you guys made my world go 'round. I know I was a pesky little sister that always wanted to hang around you guys and therefore put myself in a position to be harassed, but I took what I could get :) I remember telling on you guys a lot but that was probably just b/c I didn't want to get in trouble, and you guys were the more believable culprits. I'm sorry :)
I remember the day I graduated from high school you guys did something you'd never done before... you hugged me. And I remember that day feeling like less of an annoying little sister and more of a friend. Thank you.
I wish we lived closer... I miss seeing your faces. I miss hearing all the stupid jokes and hearing each of your distinct laughs. I miss being absurdly silly with you guys. I miss the familiarity of being around you guys. Seeing you guys at the funeral just brought back such a wave of emotion for me... I feel like I can be 100% myself around you guys and that's comforting.
So all this to say, I love you guys deeply and miss you more.
I love flying west at sunset...
This past Wednesday, my Grandma passed away. Such shocking news to hear that this vibrant, healthy woman was gone. As many of us wish for ourselves, she had no major health problems and went gently into that good night.
She lived a rich life and always knew how to have a good time. She was the one who introduced me to ballroom dancing. She was a gentle, elegant woman with more class in her little finger than I'll ever have. She was beautiful and always put together. She wouldn't even take the trash out with out fixing her hair, putting her make up on and getting dressed to the 9's. She was gracious and generous. Even though Grandma was a proper lady, she eventually fell victim to my brother's antics... and rather enjoyed them I think :) As Jon, my brother said, I always loved hearing my Grandma laugh. If Grandma laughed, you knew it was funny. Over the last few weeks, even before my Grandma died, I started hearing myself laugh just like her. I hope I can hear that even just a few more times.
Grandpa Joe died 30 years ago. I never knew him. But my Uncle Dan read a song at the funeral, a song that I might have even thought was a little cheesy if I'd heard it on the radio, but that I thought was so pertinent. The last verse is this:
"I know I'm praying for too much,
but could you send back the only man she loved.
I know you don't do it usually,
But Lord, she's dyin' to dance with my father again."
And Uncle Dan said, "So now she gets to dance with dad again." Up until this point, I'd been trying to keep it together for my mother's sake, but that just stole all my composure and I couldn't help but cry. Tears of sadness that she had been without Grandpa for 30 years, but tears of joy at the utter rest and peace she must feel in heaven.
In the limo on the way to the burial, we were all telling stories and laughing. I looked over at the driver and asked,
"Are people usually this talkative and laughing on the way to the burial?"
"Oh, no... people are usually quiet or sobbing or something. I've never had a drive like this!" she said smiling.
I think we were all just glad Grandma is in a better place... glad she is with Grandpa Joe... and glad that she was a part of our lives... and that's not something to mourn, but something to celebrate.
So back to flying west... its like chasing the sun... reminds me of lyrics from the oh so wise Flaming Lips:
"Do you realize that everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your goodbyes
Let them know you realize that life goes fast
Its hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
Its just an illusion caused by the world spinning round."
Death is a part of life and as much sadness and grief as it causes us, its what makes us cherish the people we love. The sweet is not as sweet with out the bitter. So love... and love well... because they could be gone tomorrow.
I love you Grandma. You are one of THE most beautiful women I've ever known. Say hi to Grandpa for me.
So here's the inside as I promised. California Redwood... amazing. Don't mind the stuff or my daughter posing :) We move in Monday. If you can help we'd love to have you. We start Monday morning at our old house in Webb City at 8am. I don't know exactly when we'll be at the new house, but I'd say probably around lunch time. Any help is much appreciated!
If you'd like to view more, bigger photos, you can look at them HERE.
I do NOT claim to be a great painter, but I do enjoy painting. If you don't have kids bumping into you ever five seconds, it can be quite relaxing. When Mystery (our church) renovated the building a couple years ago, we decided to put up a canvas in each of the ladies bathrooms (2). I already had a color that I liked in latex paint, so I decided to just use it instead of acrylic or oil. BAD IDEA. It was VERY thin... not so good. But at the time, we just needed to get something on the wall, so I just left it. I recently took them down to redo them. I had intended to do them both the same, but I thought of something one off that I wanted to try. And I'm proud to say that even tho they are not professional, or perfect, (and I'm sure I didn't use the "right" brushes) that I like them :) I would hang them in MY house, but alas, they will serve as bathroom art for Mystery.
The black and white one, I totally ripped off a favorite fabric print. The tree is an allyson original. any similarity to anything else is a coincidence.
So the deed is done. TWICE. Lets just hope SECOND time's a charm this time. God has been so gracious to us. From just the right timing to getting the house for much less than we intended, his hand has been upon this, undeniably. So with out further ado, here she is: (scroll down, then come back up... apparently, blogger is flawed and changes the font size after photos to something super tiny... dumb. Or you can go to my PICASA to see bigger photos since blogger won't let me do bigger ones.)
That's it? Yes, its just a sweet late 50's ranch with a walk out basement. Nothing too fantastical. But that's what I like... that's what I REALLY like :) Photos of the inside to come... in a couple weeks. I've struggled with guilt for the past few days about getting something I've wanted for so long (as this has been going on since August '10)... it almost seems like if I like something so much, I shouldn't have it. But there have been so many things that kept pointing us back to this place and after much prayer and deliberation, we just went for it.
After this contract was done though, I just couldn't help feeling guilty... Saturday night as I lay in bed, I started thinking about being in the house and started to really feel guilty... like I shouldn't have something nice. And I started to worry that all my life lived in that house would be a life plagued with guilt. And then the Holy Spirit reminded me... "no you will live a life of gratitude and glory to God." After that I just couldn't stop saying, "Thank you Jesus! Thank you Jesus!" Not necessarily that I got what I wanted, but that he would bless me with a home that will be used to glorify him and just so HAPPENS to be a house that I find artful :) But of course, my crazy brain started in again Sunday morning and during communion time, I asked Jesus for a peace about all of this and the Holy Spirit again reminded me, "I made you the way I made you for a reason. I drew you to this house for a reason. I'm putting you here for a reason. Trust me." As if to say: I didn't put you here for YOU silly... you're just blessed it turned out that way :)
Lesson learned: God is not like Lucille Bluth, aka "Gangy" from Arrested Development. He does not get off on being with-holding.
And I CANNOT WAIT to see what Jesus does. Winning!
A friend moved to Europe and decided to sell me these amazing side tables. Got a KILLER deal... I'm talking like $5/table. They are so unique. I forgot to take a before picture before I stripped them, but they were in rough shape to say the least. They'd been painted at some point, white and tan, and the paint was in pretty bad shape... you could see brush strokes, it had been slapped on and was starting to peel off in quite a few places. I tried to even just clean them and it wasn't working out so well. So since the paint was already coming off, I figured it would be pretty easy to strip them. I was definitely hesitant b/c the last time I tried to strip something, it was horrendous, but this time it was a breeze! I used the more eco friendly citrus stripper and just left it on for a few hours and it scrapped off like a dream.
I wasn't sure what kind of wood was underneath so I asked a few of my friends, got a few different answers, but I think I landed on poplar. I'm no expert, but it seemed to match. I love the combo of white and medium-dark wood, so I thought I might repaint some of it white and stain the wood a little darker and thought that the contrast would really make the details of this table pop. I don't have a paint sprayer and so I thought better of the painting idea :) After all, I didn't want to do another half assed job. These tables deserved better. And then I didn't want to stain them... as I'm sure you know I'm a bit of a hippie and so I just wanted the wood to be what God created and enjoy it in all its naturalness. So I just put some antique oil on it and it looks great. I love them.
As I said, I forgot to take a before, but the first photo here is as close as its gonna get and you can't even really see it all that well... the wood needs to be sanded still and finished (and the middle shelf put back in!). The next two photos are the finished product...
